More idle thoughts

A clearly inebriated woman, stark naked, jumped into a taxi in New York City.

The cab driver, an old Jewish gentleman, opened his eyes wide and stared at the woman, but made no attempt to start the cab.

The woman glared back at him and said, "What's wrong with you, honey? Haven‘t you ever seen a naked woman before? “

The old Jewish driver slowly answered, "Let me tell you sumsing, lady. I wasn‘t staring at you like you think. Dat vould not be proper."

The woman giggled and responded, "Well, if you're not staring at my boobs or my butt, sweetie, what are you doing then?"

He paused a moment, then told her, "Well... M'am, I am  looking, and I am looking, and I am tinking to myself, vair in da hell is dis lady keeping de money to pay tor dis ride?"

EATING IN THE FIFTIES

Pasta had not been invented. It was macaroni or spaghetti.

Curry was a surname.

A takeaway was a mathematical problem.

Pizza? Sounds like a leaning tower somewhere.

Bananas and oranges only appeared at Christmas time.

All chips were plain.

Oil was for lubricating; fat was for cooking.

Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves and never green.

Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.

Chickens didn't have fingers in those days.

None of us had ever heard of yogurt.

Healthy food consisted of anything edible.

Cooking outside was called camping.

Seaweed was not a recognized food.

‘Kebab’ was not even a word, never mind food.

Sugar enjoyed a good press in those days, and was regarded as being white gold.

Prunes were medicinal.

Surprisingly muesli was readily available. It was called cattle feed.

Pineapples came in chunks in a tin; we had only ever seen a picture of a real one.

Water came out of the tap. If someone had suggested bottling it and charging more than gasoline for it, they would have become a laughing stock.

The one thing that we never on our table in the fifties was elbows, hats and cell phones.