When I'm 64

I love the song, "When I'm 64" by the Beatles,  my take is that the song is not about being 64 but the song is about the sustaining of relationships. The lyrics are about how to keep love alive and the need we have to know that the relationship we are in is the correct one for us.

I had an interesting conversation with three young colleagues (two men and one woman), it was after work and they were talking about how to know if a relationship was good and what they could do to maintain. I was asked my views and I suspect they thought that they thought with the wisdom of age and the fact my wife has put up with me for over 48 years, that I would have the answer. I was sorry to disappoint them, but we as boomers value relationships, but many of us are not good at keeping them. All I could talk about is the following:

The idea is that we need, to be honest to our selves about what we want and what we need, at an emotional, physical, and intellectual level. To find out what we need requires hard thought, and self-investigation and is not something that is done easily. However, once you have spent the time and energy to find these things about yourself then be honest and communicate using "I language" to your partner about what you need. You may not like the answer you get back, but if you value the relationship you will have a hard conversation and hopefully reach a compromise, between what you need and what you want. (We easily confuse the two). However, it may be that your partner cannot give you what you need (not what you want) at this time in your life. If this is the case move on. Easy to say but very hard to do, however, if you want to be happy then you may have to make tough decisions about the type of relationship you want.

Back to the Beatles, I saw the Beatles when they came to Vancouver in the 60's and enjoyed the show and love their music still today. Boomers may hold on to old memories but we find ways to make them come alive today. Music was and is an important part of my life as I am sure it is in your life.

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